The following reviews of Civil War computer screen savers are a summary of numerous messages taken from the newsgroup alt.war.civil.usa
The John Brown screen saver siezes control of the CPU promising to free memory, but permanently eliminates the first free block it encounters and ends up getting hung.
I once bought the Benjamin Butler screen saver, but it took so long to come on-screen that I uninstalled it.
The same thing happened to my Little Mac screen saver. I kept getting a message: Not enough disk space! Not enough memory!
My version of the McClellan screen-saver refused to come up unless it was given more pixels. Then my Lincoln screen saver popped up a message asking the McClellan screen saver whether, if it wasn't going to come up, if it could borrow the screen for a while.
When I opened my D.H. Hill screen saver package, I couldn't find the instructions, so I just loaded the disk and got a message to check with the Stonewall Jackson screen saver, but while I was doing that, the McClellan screen saver popped up, with a message claiming that with this program (secret.exe) it could whip the Bobby Lee screen saver.
I had an Abraham Lincoln screen saver, but it kept releasing my slave drive. Which greatly annoyed the master drive.
Neither the Abraham Lincoln nor the George Thomas screen savers fit the dimensions of my screen.
You should try the Ulysses S. Grant screen-saver. The documentation promises that it will come up on the screen if it takes all summer.
If I knew what code the Ulysses S. Grant screen saver used, I'd send it to all the other screen saver manufacturers.
My John Buford screen saver worked really well until a virus killed it.
Well that wouldn't be so bad, I got a Sickles screen saver and it goes off on its own, even when I don't tell it to.
I heard that when the Sickles screen saver kills files, it pleads temporary insanity.
Actually, it is the Stanton screen saver which pops and enters the plea. Of late, however, the plea has had only one leg to stand on.
Of course that's better than the Forrest screen saver. It saves the monitor fine, but I lost thirty desktop units that the monitor rode on.
My copy of the Nathan Bedford Forrest screen saver refused to let the monitor go to black.
The Forrest screen saver also kept roaming around my hard disk so fast, I couldn't keep track of it, I think it has gobbled up some isolated utilities too.
Warning: The Forrest screen saver is incompatible with the Bragg and Wheeler screen savers.
I understand that the Forrest screen saver routinely threatens the user if the Bragg screen saver tries to give valid commands to it.
My problem was with the Rosecrans screen-saver, which had very rapid animations, but crashed at the first system conflict.
Then there's my Joe Hooker screen saver. It keeps linking me up with http://www.playboy.com/
Early this morning my new purchase arrived. I installed my Fighting Joe Hooker screensaver pursant to instructions. Everything was fine until nightfall. Then hookers jumped up in all of my programs and now my desktop is all screwed up. What do I do?
I suggest a strong draught of Meade, things will look much brighter after that.
The code in my Van Dorn screen saver kept trying to insert itself into other programs.
I had that problem, it actually got into one of my programs, but then I ran Disk Doctor, and it seemed to take care of it.
The J.E.B. Stuart screen saver was very good but the one time I *really* needed it, it was off on a joyride and I couldn't find it.
Stay away from the William Tecumseh Sherman screen saver. It set my computer on fire.
It didn't stick around and help you put it out?
The problem with the Sherman screen saver is you still get burn in.
Besides the fact that the Sherman screen saver burns up everything, it also destroyed a 50 by 300 byte chunk of my hard drive and I had no idea where it was while it was doing so. But it did give me a Christmas present when it finally reappeared.
I bought the John Bell Hood screen saver, but it was too aggressive in putting itself in upper memory.
The Hood screen just goes crazy. Same problem with the John Brown and Mary Todd Lincoln screen savers.
The Braxton Bragg screen saver always starts out fine, but crashes in the end.
I had a Bragg screen saver, but all my other programs refused to work with it.
I'm trying to uninstall my Joe E Johnston Screensaver, but it keeps retreating to a different directory.
The packaging on the Magruder screen saver was better than the reality.
I loaded the Maj. Gen. Jefferson C. Davis screen saver, and it killed my Gen. William Nelson screen saver.
The Robert E. Lee screen saver keeps popping up with a General Fault error.
There is a Shelby Foote Screen Saver. Although it is derivative, often gets the code wrong, and slows down considerable over the vowels, some users find it irresistable.
Funny thing, I was playing my Antietam simulation game the other day, and the Yankees were winning. I was about to order a retreat, but then my A.P. Hill screen saver came up.
If you understood all these screen savers, then you have a pretty good knowledge of the Civil War too.
Thomas R. Fasulo, Editor
Battle of Olustee Home Page
http://battleofolustee.org/